Nico’s Online Dating, Pickup & Seduction Blog.

I just got an email from a viewer of my videos. His situation is such a common one I decided to post my response here on my blog.

“My MySpace looks fun and attractive to me, and as far as I’m concerned, that’s all that matters. So far the only women who have sought me out through MySpace are those webcam whores who are looking for as many “friends” as possible to brag about to their real life peers and/or to steal my credit card info. No thanks.

My frustration comes out of me actually doing VERY WELL with women socially. I make them feel comfortable with me, I respect them and they respect me, I am a great conversationalist/listener, basically I’m what almost every woman I meet would consider a great guy. But the SECOND I make any sort of indication that I want to get personally involved, they freak out and never want to speak to me again. Apart from paying patronage to the bar/nightclub scene (a scene which I experimented with and felt completely out of my element), there’s not a lot that I’m doing different from more successful guys. I can make friends very easily, but I’m somehow unable to attract women the way my friends do.”

MY ANSWER…

I am not one to bullshit and waste my time or yours. So I am going to give it to you straight. I can tell a lot by what you said in your e-mail without even seeing what you look like.

First of you said “My MySpace looks fun and attractive to me, and as far as I’m concerned, that’s all that matters. “ WRONG that’s not what matters. That’s a cop out! What matters is if it produces the results you desire period. And it’s not. Your opinion does not matter.

Your attitude is that you don’t care if it works so then stop complaining about it not working since you are obviously not open to trying something else. You can expect the same results you are getting now, forever, since you are unwilling to change.

You sound like someone that wants to lose weight but is not willing to stop eating a dozen donuts and sitting on the couch all day long everyday. Meaning if you want to change your life you have to “Change Your Life” Until your willing to do that expect the same results you are getting now.

Second, you are a typical nice guy. How do I know? Because I used to be one and was never more miserable in my life.

I can read it loud and clear when you say…

“My frustration comes out of me actually doing VERY WELL with women socially.”

Now let’s be honest here. You are doing terrible with women becuase you are not getting to a sexual level with them. Who cares if you have a bunch of women friends.

Are they doing anything for you? When was the last time one took you to dinner, brought you food when you were sick, helped you with something, set you up with a friend of theirs, invited you to a party? If you going to have women friends make sure they are earning their keep and doing something of real value in your life and being real friends and helping you to meet other women. If they are not then remove them from your life. And DON’T SPEND ANY MONEY ON THEM make them pay their own way. Or they see “NICE GUY – SUCKER” written all over your face every time they look at you.

I don’t believe in the PENIS TAX (Meaning you pay for women becuase your a man, that’s a con job women make stupid men fall for. And if a woman if uses that “A REAL MAN PAYS FOR WOMEN” manipulation tactic or calls you cheap don’t fall for it they are only out to use you for what ever they can get. If your not sleeping with her she should pay her own way, becuase after all you’re just friends right. My female friends (many of which I have had sex with in the past and now we are just friends) know they have to pull their weight and be real friends and pay their own way.

Often I make the girls I have sex with pay their own way or even take me to dinner sometimes and so do all of the men I know that are most successful with women. (Some of you men reading this are thinking this is bullshit that it can’t possibly be true that women take me to dinner. Let me tell you when a woman really likes you and wants you she will take you to dinner, all of my girlfriends I have ever had took me out to dinner at some point before they became my girlfriends, being amazing in bed also helps. The price of dinner is nothing to a woman who you just gave the best sex of her life) I also reciprocate and I am very thoughtful and generous once a woman has proven her loyalty, friendship and earned my trust through her actions, but that takes awhile and a lot on her part.

You also said “there’s not a lot that I’m doing different from more successful guys.”

Yes there is a lot you are doing different but it’s all very subtle and you are not seeing it, but the women are and it starts with your mindset and is reflecting in all of your actions.

I used to be the nice guy and sound just like you.

Your problem stems from…

1.The fact that you have no understanding of what women respond to. You are listening to what they say they want or advice from other women like your mother or sister or female friends. NEVER listen to advice from women about what women want in a man. Why? Because what women are sexually attracted to is unconscious to them so they will tell you what they consciously want and not what they are unconsciously attracted to. Which is NOT what they respond to.

In fact their intellect and ego will often prevent them from telling you what turns them on. Because no self respecting woman is going to come out and say “I like a man that puts me on an emotional roller coaster and makes me feel insecure, and puts me in my place.” Yet that is exactly the guys they date.

I spent years developing myself into what I mistakenly thought women wanted based on what they say they want. I was intelligent, I was good in bed, I was honest, I respected them, I was a Gentleman, I was sensitive. I went 2 years without getting laid one time and over a year another time. None of those qualities matter to women in the realm of sexual attraction.

I was in a celibate hell in which I watched women I was attracted to have sex with pricks, assholes, jerks, that were selfish in bed and that did not give a shit about them while they flaked and snubbed me or just wanted to be my friend. And no one could tell me what was wrong with me, it was not my looks, or how I dressed. It was in my mind and in my actions and behavior.

2. You are not open to change. You want different results by doing the same actions and it’s never going to happen.

Solution:

1. Learn The Psychology of Attraction and what women want and take action and apply it. (This Blog and newsletter will help.)

2. Change your beliefs about women, yourself and your ability to attract women and get sexual with them and then act accordingly.

If you want real help with your situation and want to make a real transformation I am available for private one-on-one coaching. Or you can just stay in your current situation for as long as you like. It makes no difference to me I really don’t need the money, but I like to help people that truly want to change their life.